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Sunflower

Inferiority Complex 

Mirror of Erised

Size: 24cm*30cm

Material: digital*pen

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Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi...

Ishow no tyo urfac ebu tyo urhe arts desire...

I show not your face but your hearts desire...

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欲望之镜展现的是内心最想要的东西...不要太沉迷于内心的渴望,否则无法自拔,在现实中迷失自我

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the happinest man on earth would look in the mirror and see only himself...exactly as he is...

Inferiority complex

 

A key symptom of IC is the compulsion to compare oneself against others unfavorably.

”Comparison is the thief of joy”… Even as comparison is a function of our society, our culture and our institutions…Comparison is built into the school grading systems, we are subject to as children. Similarly they are a feature of our climb to professional success as we compete to obtain positions of status is our organizations…According to psychologists, to deny our pervasiveness to compare is not to only deny the reality, but to deny our human instinct. This is because the urge to compare ourselves with others is rooted in our survival instinct, known as self-other mergence. Self-other comparisons end up harming individual self- worth…To the person with the inferiority complex, this means that they are constantly stumbling to find self-esteem by ranking themselves against others, which is a naturally losing game, when in most situations, there is always going to be someone in the world who do better, which end up lying around, playing behind etc…

Another key symptom of IC is the false sense of superiority.

The person with an IC often feels forced to place what little self-worth they have in the few things that they can control. This can be appearance, women, and other symbols of status and wealth. They may also feel the need to brag about these things and gain external validation, to temporarily boost self-worth and make up for all things beneath the surface that they cannot control. You may have noticed in cases where an individual suffering from inferiority complex attains some level of success in a particular domain, this sense of superiority may evolve into acquired situational narcissism, this type takes when someone used to behave reasonably changes to become ego-centric, and boastful as a consequence, of acquiring prestige, welcomeness, wealth or status in a particular domain. Outwardly, this can manifest as a false sense of superiority.

Another key symptom of IC is extreme sensitivity to criticism.

They struggle to separate their output, e.g. their performance with their self-worth. As a result, upon receiving criticism, even if its meant to be constructive for their work, those suffering from IC are going to feel extremely wounded. Usually the source of sensitivity can be pinned down to their upbringing, their childhood, their relationship to their parents. Early caregivers can have an enormous impact on whether an IC is exasperated or softened. A child with a highly critical parent, who is always saying things like: “You never do things right” “You are stupid”, May internalize those admonishments so completely that they will take them well into their adulthood making them highly sensitive to criticism…

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From RomanyMalco

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在英国遇到”能量寄生虫“ “真正的隐性精神病”,”有毒之人” #就是要講实话 【英國生活工作经历特輯#1】【我在英国的成長史#1】 I met real psychopath in the UK and you could never recognize at the first sight!


大家好, 今天这期视频的主题主要是来聊聊关于我在英国生活,工作上遇到的一些隐性精神不正常和,不健康心态心理的人,我这里先会列举出六种.这是我的亲身经历,作为一个独自在英国社会打拼和对心理学有点兴趣的的中国女生,我希望大家来英国长期生活的时候至少要有点防备之心, 不会那么容易心情很糟糕,被欺骗和被PUA。因为文化价值观的差别,老外的为人处世的底层逻辑和我们是不一样的,所以大家来英国之前最好了解一下当地人的行为模式, 教育背景和心理状态.那这些cases在google 百度上是鲜少有之的,那我在这里那我作为一个亲身经历的人就和大家完全摊开来说些大实话。

还有重要的一点就是我列举的经历和人毕竟是少数,不要觉得生命里处处都是坑,保护好自己的同时,大家还是要勇敢做自己,交友,好好的生活。

你不会因为你的年纪增长而变得的更加成熟,而会因为你遇到多恶多坏的人,和多绝望无助的经历而快速成熟,成长。人生就是要不停地打怪,打得怪越多,你的级别就会越高。

1.越是善良的人,越是朋友之间交往没有任何目的的人,越是自信友善的人,越是会遇到“能量强盗“ 和 “能量寄生虫” 类型的人,这种人看上去没有没有任何“侵略性“, 甚至表面上会误导你让你觉得你们可以是很好的朋友...头几次见面就让你觉得act in a way on the purpose “异常”好到“无可挑剔“,either superficial charm and charisma, pure or naive,extremely friendly并且过分展示“好”的人 (适用于各种性别人群).
这种行为有强烈的目的性,目的就是要洗脑你让你觉得她是你最好的朋友, 他/她是最优秀的,这种行为会让敏感的人感觉到异样,但往往没有任何证据...所以一开始会轻而易举的欺骗了善良单纯的很多人, 让你喜欢上他们...时间一长,各种怪异的感觉随着他们的行为会慢慢滋长, 背后各种黑你抬高自己,.背后一套,表面一套...在你面前一套,在别人面前一套...但但对你表面上一团和气,你的信任就是这种人可以短期利用的工具并且满足他们的虚荣心...长期以往,你会慢慢发现原来你身边展现“最优秀”的人其实是最不正常的最不知羞耻的人。为了展现她/他是最优秀的人,为了让所有人喜欢他们,一定要站C 位(但没有站C位的基础和人格魅力),就各种演戏,小动作,背叛,撒谎,妥妥的无耻之徒,明里暗里防不胜防...当别人看清他们的时候,这种人会立马换一波人交往从新开始他们的“新生活”.
这种人不要给她们一点机会, 时间一长隐形中不提吸食你的能量,这种“能量寄生虫”永远觉得自己没有错,永远不会承认...长期以往,影响你做人的风水,败坏你的运气...甚至让你完全怀疑自己,甚至患上忧郁症...别不相信...遇到这种人,尽量远离...!拔腿就跑...!


2.说一套,做一套,尤其在工作上...话术连连,一开始听上去专业的很,感觉很厉害很不错哦样子, 但时间久了,尤其当你作为一个员工完全进入这个项目作业的时候,完全没有内容,甚至胡扯,作为一个旁观者当你看到他们的措辞的时候觉得他们是“正人君子”,但真正深入去了解发生什么事情的时候你就会发现他们就是在一本正经的胡说八道。 这种类型的人往往控制欲极强,一旦他失去了对你的控制和牵制,便开始无休无止的PUA你,编故事来打压打击你。 只挑有利于自己的话说, 前后话矛盾,make no sense, 只觉得自己是对的..(这些人脑子有洞, 有第一次,就有第二次第三次...)职场上真的要认真考虑好该如何去应对这种上级和同事.


3.沟通特别特别特别费力困难的人。这种人的能量和你是不同频的,这种人看到的问题角度永远跟你不一样,永远抓不住重点,永远都在反驳,反驳性人格 这种人明明知道你的为人,你说话的本质意思,就是要故意找根本站不住脚的角度否定你,质疑你,打击你,这种人根本不在乎你说了什么,他就是要赢,各种奇葩无厘头的话都说的出来...这种有毒辐射还会萦绕着你好几天, 不能沟通的人,你不要去争论不要跟这种人去相处...没必要…

 

4.莫名不接受你的人,因为嫉妒而看不得你好: 这种人还一直想徘徊在你的身边作为”朋友“ 的这一个人设, 当你看清他的时候,这种人里的一部分人在你面前的时候脸色像屎一样难看,见面两眼根本不敢看你, 不管你说什么, 不断的会说出一些“酸民”才会说出的各种奇葩抹黑恶心消极的话往你身上扔...喜欢传播不利于你的流言,背后抹黑排挤你...平时偶尔看到他们一个人独处的时候也是一副“吃屎”的难看脸色,好像特别不开心一样,这种人必须通过吸食别人的能量来获取快乐和自尊...
一句话,就是看不得你好...,你好了她就不好了,你不好她就舒心了...而且还会利用各种下作阴险手段试图击败你(他们还会各种话术来洗白他们的行为,死不承认)...从而在你身上不停榨取优越感...还死皮赖脸的说跟你关系不错…


6.从你身上达不到他们的目的就开始各种语言虐待,看不惯你的人...(这里指的是男性居多)...多少男性因为你的拒绝而换了付脸孔?多少男性因为你的自信满满和受人欢迎 (这里的自信的前提是自知和合适的自信)而想方设法编造抓住你的缺点来打击你的?


7.有严重不良嗜好和心理疾病的人 - 嫖娼,酒精依赖,赌博成瘾,严重暴力倾向, 抑郁症(尤其是青少年时期发展形成的抑郁症),自恋型人格, 极低自尊(尤其把自尊凌驾在别人的失利上), 人格障碍,戏剧型人格障碍(简称戏精), 自恋型人格障碍等等...(这里是特指那些情节较为严重者)...PS:你不要觉得这些人离你很远,他们会在你最不经意间悄然的走进你的生活工作里然后重重的打碎你作为正常人的三观来恶心你…

8.永远都活在童话里永远活在自己不切实际的想象中, 虽然是现实生活中的人, 却没有活在现实中的勇气和意识,他们的理想生活和现实的距离太远,没有自知之明,一直在要求别人优秀,但自己却一般条件, 看不上这个看不上那个,没有目标,没有兴趣,完全没有乐趣的人, 消极萎靡不振甚至怨天怨地有自杀倾向...(注意:这里指长期以往一直都是如此状态的人)
这种人其实你拯救不了,他们可能是好人,但长期以往下来会消耗你的元气, 不信你试试…


Thanks for watching! In this episode, I am going to demystify the toxic people I have experienced in the UK daily life. 

下一期视频我就会来聊聊 我们该如何应对?
 

WE found that children of irritable parents mostly have the following characteristics. Every bit hurts, 

1. its easy to think too much, sensitive and meticulous to the point of anxiety, growing up making decisions feels anxious, guilty and afraid of letting others down. 

2. you cannot reject others. Obedience has penetrated deep into their subconscious. 

3. Fear of conflict and always please others. 

4. when you grow up, you usually lose control of your emotions and become a irritable person, and lead a bad life. remember a parent;s bad temper, is the beginning of a child lifelong nightmare. 

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